The Bartlett Triangle

First published in The Hobart Mercury 18/8/09

First published in The Hobart Mercury 18/8/09


There’s nothing a politician loves more than a good metaphor, and just a hint chaps, there’s nothing a political cartoonist loves more either, so thanks for that, and keep up the good work.

Tasmanian Premier David Bartlett’s early metaphorical outing involved drawing various lines in the sand between himself and some rather troubling legacies from the previous incumbent. This seems particularly appropriate in Mr Bartlett’s case as lines in the sand are somewhat prone to being scuffed out, washed away or simply stepped over like they were never there.

A recent foray to the sandpit has been required on the issue of the likelihood of a hung parliament. The standard line on minority government in Tasmania tends to be a scare campaign on the grounds of instability. Sadly, the current majority government has displayed all the stability of a One Legged Alcoholics Bouncy Castle Convention at three in the morning, so this argument has been somewhat undermined.

This has led to David making three unequivocal mutually contradictory statements on the matter leading to the creation of the Bartlett Triangle. Lucky he stopped at three, I hate to think what a pentagram might have summoned.

Just because everyone thinks you’re an idiot doesn’t mean you’re not

tinfoilhat

Let me come out and say it: I DON’T BELIEVE IN ANTHROPOGENIC CLIMATE CHANGE.

Now before you break out the pitchforks (best dispense with the flaming torches though) I’d like to point out that when I’m thinking about crossing the road, even though I don’t explicitly believe there’s a car coming, I still tend to take a peek before stepping out, so while I don’t believe in the religious sense that human carbon emissions can definitely change the climate of the planet in a minutely predictable manner, on the evidence presented it’s quite likely something’s going on and considering the rather catastrophic potential consequences, I’m not averse to taking a few precautions.

In fact, while I really hope we can do whatever we like as a species without any consequences, on a scale of plausibility climate change is coming in a hell of a lot higher than, for example, Jesus saving us all in the event we do completely bollix up the world (I’m just saying).

Now I’m as sceptical as the next idiot, can’t get enough of it in fact, however, it is quite important not to mistake scepticism for wishful thinking or simple pig-headedness. So if you want to be a sceptic about climate change, then you bloody well BE a sceptic, just remember to cast a similarly jaundiced eye over climate research sponsored by the fossil fuel industry while you’re at it.

Where else but Queensland?

newtothis
You’ve got to love the dogged persistence of Queensland coppers when it comes to not quite getting their heads around the whole ethics thing.

I was working on the above pocket cartoon for this story in the Oz last night about them trying desperately to make two wrongs make a right, but got bumped to another story for layout.

This was a damn shame not only because I’d just come up with what I thought was a nice idea and nice ideas don’t grow on bloody trees my friends, but also because Maggie had already cracked open the nice wine. Anyway, there was a little bit of red left when I finally finished, so all was not lost.

Couldn’t happen to a nicer bloke

malignant

I’m not one to gloat (openly) at the misfortune of others, but in the case of this evil bastard, I’ll make an exception. It turns out everyone’s favourite crazy-haired dictator Kim Jong-il has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, so just as long as they keep him away from any big red buttons for the next 6 months or so, the world can only become a better place.