Let’s face it, they’re all on the naughty list anyway.

The Sunday Telegraph, 21 November 2010

In a wildly optimistic moment, Premier Keneally has told her cabinet to keep their clothes on and behave themselves at office Christmas parties this year. She then went on to instruct ministers to ensure media advisers and chiefs-of-staff did not post inappropriate comments or photographs on Facebook or Twitter.

Now while I’ve never had any experience being a state premier myself, telling members of the NSW Labor party to behave themselves and not post the evidence on social media sites strikes me as being somewhat like pulling on a pair of bright red trakkie dacks and waving one’s backside in the direction of an enraged bull.

Eat, drink, be merry and share it all on Facebook I reckon, you might as well enjoy the last few days of Rome.

A Lazarus never rises twice

Sunday Telegraph, 24 October 2010

Absence makes the heart grow fonder, especially when applied to Prime Ministers, though for some, “fonder” refers to a transition from seething hatred to a slightly diminished level of seething hatred. John Howard has sensibly let a few years and a couple of other Prime Ministers telling lies and stuffing things up make us feel a bit wistful for the good old days when at least you didn’t have any false hopes left to be dashed.

Sadly, John couldn’t leave well enough alone and he’s ripping the scab off this week, releasing the slightly disturbingly titled autobiography “Lazarus Rising”. The only good name for an ex-PM’s autobiography is “It Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time” and it should contain an unconditional apology for pretty much everything, leaving Kevin extremely well-placed to get it right when his comes out (possibly serialised with subtitles in The Monthly).

I strongly recommend you avoid reading Lazarus Rising and just let him stride off purposefully into the sunset, let’s face it, you really aren’t going to change your mind about the bloke either way. However, if you can’t help yourself, consider purchasing the definitive John Howard biography as an antidote, a bargain at $10 a throw.